3 Months On..

Clara is 3 months old already. How fast. Compared to her brother, she is really alot easier but I don't think it's because Bradley was difficult, it was because we were inexperienced parents. I'm digging this parenting job most days - just gotta constantly remind myself my kids didn't choose this, we did. With lesser and more realistic expectations, everyone is happier.

Today we took Clara for her jab. She's 8.2kg! Yay! I can have chubby baby too. Frankly at this stage, chub or not doesn't really matter, I've learned that every babies and kids are different. What's most important is their health and wellbeing. And of cos, mummy's wellbeing too. Happy mummy = happy babies.

Another Year Wiser

Hopefully.

I turn 31 today. My day went on as usual, revolving around the kids. No major celebrations nor need for surprises or gifts. DH and I have long past this stage. These days we prefer to spend money on family activities or the kids. Is that how it's like when you are a parent?

Don't get me wrong. We get a fair bit of couple time despite not going out. The kids sleep fairly early and when they do, it's OUR time.

My bday wish?

Our family of 4 to be happy and healthy together.

Do You Believe In Second Chance?

I do. Because I am living one.

Having Bradley is a miracle. Being blessed with Clara is double the miracle.

While we weren't infertile, it took us a while to conceive B. And followers of this blog will know it really boiled down to poor and wrong timing. When B came along, DH and I were out of this world happy. He was the best thing that happened to me.

And then came Clara. While she wasn't exactly a surprise, I think it's fair to say we weren't expecting her so soon. We conceived her the first month we tried. 

Initially I was so worried I couldn't love her as much as I do with B and how was I supposed to divide my love among them? People tell me you do not just divide your love, it multiplies. I wasn't sure.

Now I understand. Seeing her grow everyday just makes my heart melts. I've been given a second chance to enjoy this motherhood gig all over again . Things I couldn't enjoy previously being a first time mum - the lack of experience, the anxiety, the nervousness and the whole nine yards - I could now.

That's why I say I've been given a second chance.

And I'm not wasting this chance, for when it's gone, it will be gone for good.

Is This Sleep Regression?

I have been a sleep nazi with B for the longest time. Old habits die hard.

Maybe because I was traumatized by those days I had to sit by his cot for 2 hours resulting in no sleep at all. Then things took a turn for the better, especially after his first birthday. His naps were improving and as he grew, outlook seems bright. All until the arrival of little sister and in fact started during pregnancy.

He had been STTN, well at least in my books apart from the sips of water he takes. All this stopped about 5 weeks ago. Last 3 days he had been waking up crying, although he goes back to sleep almost immediately and he wakes up before 6 almost everyday. People tells me not to let him sleep so early so he will wake later. Sorry, not the case with my son. He wakes up before 7am regardless of his bedtime.

Today, DH leaves for his biz trip and when he left the house At 530am, Mr B woke and I couldn't put him back to bed. I wanted to cry. I woke at 5am hoping to get most chores and my mind prepped for the busy day ahead, as well as shower before DH Leaves. With his early wakening, I didn't get to drink my coffee or rest when I was done with the laundry. It was like "bam! off to work u lazy bum, no relaxation for u". Really wanna cry you know.

Boy I miss drinking a hot, scratch that, even a warm cup of coffee.

They always turn cold when I finally get to drink them.

Jaundice Check

I don't think I posted here but when Clara was 5 days old, she was admitted for phototherapy and it was a pretty stressful period not just becoz of that,  but having to manage B as I was staying in with C. Anyway I am so glad that episode is over and definitely not looking back.

When she was admitted, her jaundice level was 13, considered borderline high for a 5 day old. Upon discharge it was 8.5 and 3 days later it wad 10.5 but pd said it's not too worrying as she was older then and the threshold it different. Moreover in that 2 days after discharge,  she gained weight well and output was great too. So no follow up needed unless I was unsure.

Fast forward to the jubilee weekend. My mum and sis started commented she's looking very yellowish and started dishing out advice to sun her. I know in the past we sun our jaundice babies but I have had 2 different pds telling me sunning is of not much help. Anyway they made a fuss and I got worried so took her to Dr Zainal for a follow up check and blood test to rule out any liver function failure.

I don't deny I was concerned too so when Dr called me with the results, I was more than relieved. It is just bm jaundice which we has suspected and should go away by itself latest by 3 months. Phew. And during the assessment, Dr commented C is overall doing well in terms of her weight gain.. in fact she's over 97th percentile! 2 kg weight gain in 1 month that's pretty awesome.

So, it really is possible to love your second born as much as the first born. And all those guilt I had towards B, I'm still feeling it but in a way I'm also guilty towards C. Her brother still had a good 2 years and abit more of 1-to-1 personal time but for her, attention is all split up.

At the end of the day,  no matter how hard a day I had,  I just count my blessings for this 2 healthy kiddos.

Clara's Full Month

The Jubilee Weekend is over. That also marks the end of my confinement and the beginning of running solo during the week with DH going back to work today.

Coincidentally, this long weekend was timely for us to celebrate Clara's full month. With Bradley, we had a party at home and whilst it was fun having friends and relatives over, we were absolutely knackered by the end of it. So this round we decided no matter what happens, we are not doing it at home. And, to prevent conflicts of any sort (really more on appeasing me), I told DH it might be a better idea to separate the celebrations with our families, on the pretext that everyone will have enough time with the baby and no need to fight over her. Smart move eh?

So on Friday we went over to my in laws for a gathering of some sort. I have to give it in to MIL, she prepared a lot of food enough to feed a village, and there were only 10 of us including her 2 guests. Saturday was the party for my family which we planned for a while and decided to get it done in a restaurant as opposed to my initial idea of the function room at my sis' condo. Had we do it at her condo, our cost would be much lower, but there would be cleaning up and self servicing. We thought it would be nice for once to do it outside and not worry about cleaning up later, and having people serve us. It busted my (ideal) budget but at least it was in a comfy environment (private room at Jamie's Italian) with great food and company. With that marks the end of Clara's celebration.

But it's not over! We had yet another gathering at my sis' for National Day and yet more food. But seriously, parties are of a different meaning to me now. With just 1 child, I still had the luxury of enjoying the party after I made sure he's fed etc. But now with 2, omg, it was feeding B, then B goes off to play, feed C, then time to change B, then change C, and feed C and then feed B. I'm confused and lost myself. Needless to say, I didn't catch much of the parade with all this hustling between the kids. It will be what, another 2-3 more years before life gets slightly easier? Or am I too naive to think so?

SMB Blog Train - Mummy's Me-Time

When Mummy Danessa asked if I would be interested to join her blog train on me-time, which will run from July to August, my first instinct was, "no". My second baby would be due in early July and I don't think I will have time to update my blog, let alone talk about me-time. But, I decided to go ahead and commit myself to the blog train because, isn't this what me-time is all about? Finding time amidst your busy schedule, be it at work or home, to spend some time with yourself? This will also give me an opportunity to reflect as well as see how we are doing with this parenting gig.

So, here I am, with my 3-weeks old baby napping in her cot and my 2-year old napping in his room. Someone say "ahhhhh.... bliss". Usually, I would be napping with them especially since my day sorta started at 4.45am today. But since I've just finished some ibanking and computer is on, why not?

Me-time in my previous life, aka Before Children (B.C) were all about going shopping alone, going for a massage, mani/pedi session. Sometimes when I get really frustrated at work, I go and dine on my own for lunch, enjoying the peacefulness and not having to answer/speak/entertain anyone. Other times when a little perk-me-up would do the job, I get into a hair salon for a hair wash or get a quick shoulder massage.

But, these were all BC. Now, after the arrival of not 1, but 2 kids, the luxury of sitting on the porcelain throne in peace without having the session disrupted is a welcome Me-time. So, how do I keep my sanity?

1. Marketing - as aunty as it sounds, going to the market alone can be quite liberating. I don't have a toddler I have to run after or pestering me to carry. I can take my own sweet time at each stall and remember everything on my to-buy list. Sometimes I even get to buy coffee and sip it while I get the weekly groceries done. But, I've not gone to the market since Clara was born and I have a feeling I probably won't be able to do so soon.

2. Shower - forget bath. Shower is a great Me-time. This confinement, I broke all rules and showered twice a day which is my norm. I take longer showers in the morning because I wash my hair. Those minutes in the bathroom, in total privacy (not always the case) are well cherished. I never really used to scrub my body in the bath nor be very conscientious with applying lotion, facial regime etc. But I have since been religiously doing so... erm... just to extend my time in the bathroom. LOL. Ok la, and I think I really should be doing these maintenance work since I don't have the luxury of going to the spa or facial.

3. Breastfeeding Clara - Ok, I know I should be bonding with my girl when she nurses but she happily closes her eyes while drinking away, so I gotta find something to do to entertain myself right? I look down at her for too long the nape of my neck starts to hurt. So during nursing or pumping sessions, I catch up with what's happening on Dayre - commenting and replying, I check in on FB and Instagram but lately even this is a luxury. Most of the time when I nurse Clara, I'm playing with Bradley at the same time. And my favourite activity to do while doing the night feed is.... sleep.

So, come to think about it, mummy's me-time is as good as nothing. But I have learnt to lower my expectations, and quite frankly, both Bradley and Clara, and my husband are the loves of my life, I'm more than happy to spend my waking moments with them.

Next on the blog train is....

Pooja Kawatra blogs at Mums&Babies. A full time working mom who turned into a stay-at-home-mom, she enjoys spending time with her two little angels and growing everyday with them. She spends time cooking, baking and crafting with her kids at home.

Click on here to read more about other mummies and their me-time!