Before getting pregnant, I always thought breastfeeding is a given, i.e. you give birth to a baby, you breastfeed baby. But after doing some research and hearing other's breastfeeding stories, it is NOT a given. Not many women can nurse their babies for various reasons. And of course, if I have a choice, I'd choose to breastfeed for as long and as much as I can.
For some strange reasons, last night was the second time I've dreamt of breastfeeding Bradley (oh yes, we've named our boy!) since I got pregnant. The dream was so vivid I recall the process being so incredulous. Witnessing the baby suckle on, it felt great that you are able to provide for him.
Obviously, a dream is just a dream right?
But my life now is filled with dreams. Dreams of how our lives would be when Bradley enters the world; dreams of what kind of parents we would be; dreams of how much joy Bradley will bring to us. Thinking of these dreams bring a smile to my face. How is it possible to miss or love someone without even meeting them yet?
Our last visit to Dr W, she gave us many printouts of Bradley - his side view, bottom view, his tiny feet, and his face! I scanned a couple of it and saved it on my phone. Every day, I will look at the shot of his face - it's amazing you can make out his eyes and his facial expression looked like he was smiling - and smile to myself. We made this little guy. I can't wait to meet him. But every day, I also worry if I'm providing enough for him, is he growing ok, the worries just don't stop, do they?
On a lighter note, my friend who had a miscarriage in August seems to have good news again. Looks like she's pregnant again. I've heard of success stories of how after a mc, one will get pregnant again pretty soon. Looks like she's just proven it. I'm so happy for her. Afterall, it was her initial pregnancy that got me so motivated into trying again.
Meanwhile, the countdown to seeing Bradley again begins. 26 more days!!
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