When I was carrying B, I had many ideals on how I want to bring this child up. There were many must-dos and no-can-dos I had in mind. For example, do not carry baby immediately when he cries. This is pretty much a no-brainer, but there seems to be two school of thoughts. One says you should not carry baby immediately and perhaps are advocate of cry-it-out methods. Another says baby at this stage needs to be carried and soothed immediately, otherwise it would affect their confidence and independence level when they grow up. I do a bit of both, but mostly the latter. Not because I want to give in to B but his cries, OMG, are really loud and sharp and painful for my ears. To those from the second school of thought, who said babies are too young at this age to have a habit, I say to you, "WRONG!" Babies are smarter than you and I - now B knows as long as he screams his lungs out, he gets things his way, mainly wanting to be carried instead of lying or sitting down all the time. So I'm slowly letting him realise that this is not going to work, even if it means my ears have to suffer. I hear my alter ego snorting.
Another no-no I had in mind was not to give him pacifier. I was weaned off the pacifier when I was probably around 3 or 4 years old. I still remember the exact day when my dad tried to wean me off by asking me if its ok for him to throw my tu-tu away. And me being me, said ok, and saw him throw it into the rubbish chute. It took only a few minutes for me to recognise that my pacifier is gone and I started tearing. Thankfully dad was only testing water and produced it from his back. The whole experience must have been traumatizing for a 4-year-old that I remember it to this day. I certainly do not want B to be on the pacifier till he's 4 and really hope to wean him off it latest by 1. But in my short 4 months experience as a mother, I've come to realise hope and reality are often heaven and earth apart.
I also had my own thoughts about letting baby sleep in a sarong cradle. Personally I feel there's nothing wrong with it, but just didn't liked the idea. But even before we introduced the sarong to B, he had difficulty sleeping well in his cot. His startle reflex often woke him up and he doesn't nap long in his cot. Then my mum introduced the cradle, which I accepted reluctantly, as I wanted to make sure she has it easy taking care of B when I return to work. It was a breeze putting him to sleep in the sarong, and in time to come, I had gotten use to that and putting him to bed at night back home proved to be tough. We caved in and bought one for our home use. For the first couple of weeks, it was ok, we would put him to sleep there, and carry him to his cot once we were ready to call it a night. But I'm glad now, we are less reliant on it, especially since we moved him to his room - we only use it during the day for his nap.
Whilst it took me 3 attempts at different time of the day to complete this post, my life IS complete. Yes I may be extremely tired, but nothing I can't get used to. My body has accustomed to it and I feel normal. Yes, pumping is so tiring and dictates when and where we can go out and have on many occasions thought of stopping, but no one actually forced me to continue. I can stop right now, but I'm not. So who's to complain? Yes I miss my freedom, but there's more joy to seeing your child smile at your like you're his favourite person in the whole world. For this, I'm willing to throw my ideals outta the window and enjoy life as it is now.
Done! :)
ReplyDelete