Christmas Playdate

This is the second year the April '13 mummies group gathered for Christmas.

Last year, our bubs were still crawling around but this year, they are RUNNING about.

B received a train set which he absolutely adores. We waited till he went to bed and set it up so that he could be surprised the next morning. Well, suffice to say, the look on his face the next morning was absolutely priceless.

Lucky B!

Second Meeting with Beanie - Oscar Scan

We had been looking forward to Christmas eve, not exactly because of the festive holidays, but because we were going to meet beanie!

We were scheduled to do the Oscar scan on Christmas eve so DH and I have been counting down to this day. The last time we did a scan I was about 6w3d and beanie was only a, well, a bean. Yesterday, at 11w3d, we saw beanie's arms and legs and cute little nose, it was so touching. And having DH and B in the ultrasound room with me made everything so special.

Beanie is definitely more cooperative than B was when we did the Oscar. The scan was completed in 10 minutes and we headed back up to see Dr W. Gave her and her clinic assistants their Christmas gifts and they seemed genuinely surprised. The results of the scan will probably be out soon and may expect to hear from Dr W tomorrow. Frankly, I'm not at all bothered with the scan nor the results because we have decided termination of the pregnancy is not an option even if the baby has Downs.

Next visit, hopefully we will be able to tell beanie's gender! CANNOT wait!

And my tummy seemed to have grown overnight. Is that possible?!

December Staycation

Before we found out I was expecting beanie, we made family plans to do a road trip by chartering a private coach to Sunway Lagoon. The last time we traveled as a family was to Malacca and that was at least 4 years ago. Then some of us couldn't make it, so the plan changed to flying up to Penang since I haven't been. And then the kiasi me found out about the pregnancy and decided to can the trip because I don't want to travel in the first trimester.

Anyway, long story short, we didn't make it overseas, and DH and I thought we could have our own little family staycation in town, by splurging a little more on a nice hotel with a good room. So I went on to do a research. The dates coincide with the Christmas festive season so we had in mind to let B stay up later to experience the Orchard Christmas lighting. Most of the Orchard hotels were to "hotelsy" for me and we finally decided on Goodwood Park and book ourselves a nice little suite.

The hotel and rooms are no doubt dated, but the size of the room compensated everything. The moment we entered our room, B who was initially wary as usual, broke into a grin and jumped down the floor and started exploring the room. Of course, the sliding doors would appeal to him most, he spent a lot of time in and out the wardrobe. Let's just say the room and bathroom were massive and we were completely contented just staying indoors.

The problem with sitting on the post for so long is you tend to forget what you want to write about. In short, it was an incredible holiday, I was not bothered by morning sickness too much (hopefully that has subsided), B had a ball of a time and that made us super happy too. Spending time as a family especially now that DH is on leave makes me so happy.

Really, I'm just happy that there's someone to relieve me of taking care of Bradley. :p

LA Madison Preview [Sponsored]

A couple of Saturdays back  we had an invitation to attend a blogger preview for LA Madison Marine Parade. It is an enrichment centre that combines montessori and Reggio Emilia approach in early childhood education in their programmes for children 18 months to 6 years old.

Whilst I have more or less confirmed B's kindergarten (that's a post for another day), I thought it would be a good opportunity to learn what LA Madison has to offer. And since I'm not sending B to school until 2016, this could be an option for him before kindergarten starts.

Some background information about LA Madison:

Their vision is "to be the leader and innovator in early childhood education" by providing happy and safe environment where children can achieve their fullest potential before embarking on their compulsory education.

They have 4 primary programmes for children age 18 months to 6 years old:

Happy Feet - 18 months to 3 years old

• Focuses on development of functional independency and important sensorial and cognitive skills 

Explorer  - 3 to 4 years old

• Focuses on the learning of phonics and language through activities such as dramatisation and role playing, concept of math and planning and implementation of simple scientific investigations

Thinker - 4 to 5 years old

• Children will be exposed to different learning possibilities to challenge their logical and critical thinking skill and understanding of math and science concepts

Enlighter - 5 to 6 years old

• Focus on the development of greater independence and self-control of the children

As you may know, B has never been exposed to a school environment and I always had the intention to let him experience it sooner rather than later so that it will be less traumatic for him when the time comes for him to go to school. Suffice to say, it was an eye opener for me as well to see how B would react in such an environment. Of course, in the beginning, he clung on tightly to me, but when he saw the play area, he simply couldn't resist.

There's water and there's sand, of course he couldn't resist. Somehow, I felt a strange tinge seeing him play amongst other kids.

The kids were given time to warm up a little with the sand and water play in this little playroom next to the classroom. It worked but when the time came to proceed to class, we had to pry B off, and even when class started, he kept wanting to escape the room and get back to the play area.

So the parents were given a preview of how classes would be conducted. Typically, lessons are conducted in Mandarin or English during the entire 2 hour session per day and rotated daily. But since this was a preview for the parents, we got to experience both during the 2 hours we were there. 

It started off with Mandarin class, exploring the underwater world and various types of sea creatures, a short tea break where sandwiches were served and then back to class with English lessons. There was quite a bit of singing and dancing which the older kids participated in, B, didn't really know what was going on and was only really interested in the bubble machine.

I like how the teachers were flexible with B. When they were supposed to paste some pictures on a designated wall with instructions, B was oblivious and in his own world, the Chinese teacher suggested he paste them on the wall nearer to him instead, and this worked out perfectly for him. He liked the activity and kept going forward to get more fish to paste on the wall.

The last picture above is of the class making a crab. B was only interested in those plastic eyes and the teachers were also flexible to let him play with it and were even playing along with him. So, that I was rather impressed despite my initial thoughts of them being disorganised. Quite understandably though, since that day was their very first class and they were probably relying on the previewers to provide them with some feedback.

If you are interested in finding out more about LA Madison, they are having an open house on 20th December, you should check it out:

LA Madison Open House

Date: 20 December 2014, Saturday

Time: 930am to 12pm

Venue: 1 Marine Parade Central, #04-07 Parkway Centre (same building as MacDonalds)

You can RSVP for the programme talks and preview by calling 82004052 or email: enquiry@la-madison.com. 

For more information, please like their Facebook page and share with your friends and other parents who might be interested.

And.... LA Madison is kind enough to offer my readers a special package if you sign up at their open house!

All you need to do is quote my blog when you register your child during the Open House and get extra classes for the first month. Sign up for their daily programme (5 days/week) and get additional 4 Saturdays of free classes, or sign up for their 3 day/week programme and get additional 2 Saturdays of classes for free.

My suggestion is go and have a look and feel at the centre and hear what they have to offer - it might just be something you have been looking for or perhaps give you an idea of what to expect. Have fun at the Open House!

Day 3 and counting

Ok...ay. ...

So yesterday seemed to be fine too.. though there was still some slight nausea. Today, so far so good, we'll see.

DH came home last night after being away for 4 nights. He had wanted to take the day off today to spend time with B, but there's too much work to do before he travels again on Monday, then it's his time off. He will be on about 2 weeks leave and it will be a blast for B! We had originally planned on the family trip to Penang but because of a few other reasons,  that had been canned. Our little family of 3, plus little beanie of course, will be doing a staycation in Orchard so B can experience the Xmas lighting. Hopefully by the time I pass my first trimester, we can tag along with daddy on one of his business trips.. he has so many coming up.

There's so much to do before beanie arrives. I know that's not till July but given the way we procrastinate, it will be here before we know it. The next big project, converting our dressing room into baby room and getting our carpenter build a wardrobe for our room.

Exciting!

Finally Normal... Or Not?

After what felt like forever, today, I felt normal.

I finally felt normal enough to bring B to the playground. It has been sooooo long since we last went down and he had such a great time on the slides. I felt so guilty.

The last 2 weeks was a disaster. There was no fixed time for the morning sickness to set in. Sometimes it starts right after I wake and I know that day will be a bad day. Some day I feel alive and fully functional until late afternoon where I'll be completely miserable. On my bad days, I've tried all the supposedly tested ways to curb morning sickness, from taking small meals, to sipping ginger or peppermint tea, to using the Sea-band which works on your nei-guan pressure points to relieve nausea, to using essential oils, basically everything, they all do not work. What did work was to really let it go, i.e. throw up. So I had been busy burying my head in the toilet bowl. Sighs.

I have not cooked for the family for a while. Poor B has been porridge if it was just me and him at home. Thankfully I have my mum cook for him, so at least he gets some variety. I am out-of-this-world thankful for this little trooper who has been nothing but cooperative. Just 2 days back, I was vomiting my gut out in the bathroom and I heard him come up behind me, closing and opening the toilet door. Then he stepped in, which I couldn't stop him but say, "Bradley please don't come in, mummy's sick". You wouldn't believe what the boy did next. After I flushed, he came right up to me while I was still squating on the floor, and buried his head in my chest like how he would when I ask him to "sayang" mummy. I broke down in tears and hugged him so tight. Then he pushed me away after 2 seconds.

What have I done to deserve this sweet little thing? Oh I could cry again.

Sorry, I blame it on the raging hormones.

Hope to be back real soon!

There's Always A First

25 Nov 2014
6:47pm

First projectile vomiting. Miserable while at it. Relieve after.

There's always a first time.

19 Months On

My baby is going to be 19 months tomorrow. He's really less of a baby and more of a person, a strong-willed person.

I've been taking him to my mum's place a lot. For one, I needed someone to watch over him while I try to recover from this morning sickness, and two, it is important for him to get really familiar there so that by the time beanie is ready to meet the world, B feels comfortable spending time there while we are at the delivery room. It worked, he wanders around the house like his own, playing with my nephew, my brother and my mum. The other day, I left him there while I went to run some errands at the post office and he didn't even looked for me once. An accomplishment.

I had wanted to send him to parent-and-child playgroups by the time he reaches 18 month, but the lazy mummy hasn't got to checking things out. The last time I did, the schedules and timings weren't fantastic and I somewhat had the idea he wouldn't be able to stay still and participate. I don't know, is my laziness putting him at a disadvantage? Can't he learn and pick up skills at home with me? I do teach him a lot, through day to day activities... he's learned to count from making his milk every night (the number of scoops we add to the water), he knows the alphabets from singing and watching some YouTube videos (which I'm really surprised!) and of course, other skills like brushing teeth, being read to. So, I'm on the fence as to whether we should send him for "proper" classes per se.

His language abilities surpasses my expectations of him most of the time and one of my favourite things to do is just simply observe him while he plays. He is showing his cheeky aspect of his character slowly day by day. Its no wonder why people say boys are mischievous. For someone his age, he can tease both his parents and make us laugh like crazy.

It really warms my heart to know that this little person we created has brought so much joy to our lives, and its gonna double real soon!

Morning Sickness

This morning sickness business is no joke.

With Bradley, I was blessed enough to have no morning sickness and other pregnancy symptoms like sore boobs. I did recall though, at 6 to 8 weeks of the pregnancy was the most uncomfortable one, but nothing like what I'm experiencing now. Back then, I experienced slight nausea during those 2 weeks of pregnancy, usually happening after lunch and I too, had no appetite for dinner. This time, whilst the ms hits me worse around 3pm onwards, it could happen anytime of the day too. DH argued it was similar with the first pregnancy but I don't think it was this bad. Maybe because this time, I had a toddler to care for.

I cannot stand chicken, the look, smell and even hearing it. The pot which I used to make chicken soup and stew for B, I cannot even bear to look at i I can somewhat smell it. I made a big pot of chicken stock but I can't go near it. DH had to do all the portioning and cleaning up. I'm so thankful for him as all I could do last weekend was to feel sick.

Let's hope by the time we pass week 8, this will ease up like it did.

Say Hello To The Flickering Light Part 2

Read part 1  where we said hello to Bradley for the very first time.

On Wednesday, we said hello to our little beanie for the very first time too. Both times I was extremely nervous, but I guess with the first pregnancy, I was even more so. This time round, because I experienced morning sickness, I was kind of thankful for it while waiting for our first appointment.

Our little family of 3 strutted into Dr W's office and didn't have to wait long as we were the first patient. We chatted with the nurses, took my blood pressure, weight.... everything was so familiar yet so, so surreal.

We had a quick chat, Dr W was observing B and it was just like a routine check up until she said, "ok, let's go do the scan!". Our little beanie appeared on the screen, with the flickering heartbeat going strong. I could just cry with relief while KK carried B to the screen and showed it to him. Of course, he had no idea, he was more interested in the toys. It was then, it really sunk in. We are pregnant.

:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

This is very likely going to be my last pregnancy, so I am going to make every effort to enjoy the entire journey as best as I could. Recording down every milestones, big or small, so that not only will I remember them, but they will serve as beautiful memories in years to come.

Next appointment: Oscar scan on Christmas Eve! See you then beanie. Mummy, Daddy and Kor Kor loves you!

The Reality

Now that the reality has sunk in, I am somewhat starting to feel the jitters all over again.

Until we see beanie's heartbeat on the screen, everything remains uncertain. So I'm trying to keep a positive mindset and channel all the positivity to beanie, we all know how hard he/she is working now.

Besides the fatigue, everything else is going great. I told DH I have a feeling this round I will have food cravings as compared to the last where my appetite weren't great and absolutely NO cravings. Maybe that was why I managed to only put on 8kg for the entire pregnancy. This time, I hope not to exceed 10kg through diet control and hopefully able to squeeze some exercise in.

As when I was expecting B, I had a lot of dreams. Sex dreams mainly. And also I kept dreaming I was smoking and inhaling deeply or finishing a cigarette before remembering I was pregnant. This bloody nightmare is back to haunt me again. I haven't had a cigarette in a real long time, so why this dream again?!

One more week to the doctor's appointment, see you then beanie!

Journey Ahead Part 2

This blog started when DH and I were planning to start a family. I wanted to jot down all the memories, including the agonising ones, on how we come about to the family we are today. Looking back, I have no one else to blame except myself. I just needed to be more aware of my cycle. But that said, had I not gone through that process, I wouldn't have understand my body better like I do now.

When we first found out I was expecting B, I hesitated on whether I should announce it on my blog after the first 12 weeks. You can read about it here. In the end I decided to go ahead with it as this was the place that I want to jot down the entire journey. So I went ahead and updated at about 6 weeks pregnant. Every post thereafter was mainly on the pregnancy updates, when the next doctor visit would be, what we saw during the visit and how we planned for his arrival. Oh boy, just the memories alone I will treasure so much.

We recently decided to start trying for baby #2 since it took us awhile to conceive B. And by trying, I mean no contraception. So you can imagine our surprise when we found out I was pregnant after the first cycle.

I wasn't sure what made me POAS but remember that day when I was exhausted? I found it a bit weird because when I was giving B a shower at 930am, I was so tired I could sleep in the bathroom. I went to bed at 830pm that evening not even welcoming DH home from his overseas trip.

Subsequently it was the frequent toilet visits and me not being able to finish my dinner that got me suspicious. When my period was a day late, I decided to test because it has always been on time and I didn't want to speculate, I had a ladies night planned this week. I didn't even need to wait for the results on the pee stick, it was immediately 2 lines and I started shaking and laughing because that was almost too good to be true. Made DH buy me a digital kit so I could test again.

So there you go, we're expecting baby #2. I know the journey ahead is going to be tough, but hopefully this time round, we are better prepared. I got all emotional thinking I wouldn't be able to focus all my attention on B when #2 comes along, but the consolation is he will have a playmate, and that's what we always wanted.

Beanie, daddy, mummy and kor kor look forward to welcoming you to our happy family.

The Journey Ahead

So many exciting things coming my way... bear with me while I get sorted and will share more as we move along.

For now, life is as good as it can get with an amazing 18-month toddler and a doting husband, both of whom are the loves of my life. Maybe the toddler more than the hubby :p

Be back with more updates soon.

SEA Aquarium - Sentosa

Taking B to the aquarium was one of the things I'd really wanted to do. When he was still crawling, we told ourselves once he could walk, we will bring him there.

When he did started walking, it was rather havoc, so we postponed it. Besides, we would never consider going there on weekends. Yesterday was great, because DH took the day off and we had nothing on our agenda, so we went there after lunch.

What a wonderful time we had there! B was so fascinated with all the underwater creatures and we spent a long time there. The best thing? Entire place was air-conditioned and very cooling compared to the outdoors. We parked at Vivocity and took a train over since B is into trains these days. We had such a great time and were worn out by the time we left, but oh so well worth it.

Exhaustion

I am beyond exhausted. DH had been traveling and finally back last night, which I did not get to welcome him home because I was asleep at 830pm! It has been such a long time since I slept so early - yesterday was an extremely tiring day I had no idea why.

But, my dear hubby has taken the day off tomorrow "so that mummy can have a break, if baby allows it". I have ambitious plans of getting a massage, having my brows shaped or even a pedicure. But I don't wanna waste any family moment, let' see.

Now, let me catch forty winks before B wakes from his nap.

Toddlers' Made Up

I think toddlers' minds are engineered this way:

• Refusing food when offered and asking for when not
• Fighting z-monster even if they are very tired
• Wanting to walk when they can't
• Wanting to be carried when they can walk well
• Living by the motto "persistence beats resistance"
• Ability to cling on your legs any time anywhere
• Liking a particular food item only to decide they dislike it the next 1 minute
• Making their parents blow their top and making them extremely guilty about it

However my toddler's mind is engineered, it was engineered by me. The fault's all mine and I love him no matter how and what, and the love is exploding.

Alternative Treatments

I am not one of alternative treatments and healing. But I am one who is willing to try anything and everything (with sufficient research of course) that will make my son's life easier, health better and recover faster should he fall ill.

The last bout of cold he caught took about 2 weeks to recover and it was disheartening to see his face shrink. So since then, I have been somewhat careful with him. Or so I thought.

One fine Saturday afternoon, DH and I wanted some beers and the only thing that can keep B happy while we down some beer is water. Water, beer.. We can only think of Clarke Quay. Off we went, had our beers and B had such an amazing time, but that left him with a runny nose almost immediately.  I beat myself up over and over again for being so irresponsible. Anyway, this round I was much more prepared. We had medication on standby and B did not seem uncomfortable at all. Thankfully his appetite was not affected.

But what I really want to share is the introduction of essential oil this round.  I've heard of many using EO as an alternate treatment as opposed to medication but it never occurred to me to try it. In my attempt to get him recover faster, I decided to give it a go. And you know what, it gave me a very pleasant surprise.

Well, it is MLM no doubt, but the products did prove effective. There are many brands out there and I am not to say which one is more superior as I have only tried one brand. Surprisingly, my usually skeptical sister is also using it as she knows the distributor, and it helped with her migraine. That said, I am not advocating alternative treatments - I still think going to the doctor is the best and such treatments should be used as a preventive measures.

The 8th October 14

8 years ago, we said "I do" on this day. I bet there were times you and I both regret the decision. But those were times we were blinded by many things. I'm so glad we stepped into the light together and never look back since. What a great gift we have today, the fruit of our loins.

Happy anniversary and I love you.

Decisions, decisions

Baby #2... or not?

Someone whose baby is younger than B is expecting her second child. Another friend whose #2 is same age as B is expecting #3.

Decisions, decisions.

The Days Gone By... Summary

I am sitting on many drafts for the blog, so I've decided to consolidate some drafts into one and maybe, just maybe, one day I might be able to clear those drafts.

I figured the best way to do this is probably chronologically, and by looking at the photos I took on my phone.

Inspired by my friend Karen, I brought B to the library and got him his personal library card! My very first trip to the library was around 8 years old and I've always enjoyed going there, borrowing books, returning them (late and paid fines), browsing the audio cds and watching some vcds there. Of course B is too young but since he likes books so much, I thought this is a good habit to cultivate early. But I must say I am a tad disappointed because a lot of the books are in very poor condition that I wasn't sure I want to let him hold them. That said, I think the onus is on the parents to teach their children to take care of not just their own property, but public property.

**

Last Friday, we had an impromptu play date at a friend's place and I love how our kids were able to engage in free-play in a safe environment while the mummies exchange experiences and share knowledge on taking care of our children. Whilst it is important to focus on the kids' development, mummies sanity are equally important. B and I have come such a long way that I can finally say things are going great (please, please don't jinx it).

I know kids their age parallel play more than play with each other, so this scene really shocked me and made me really fuzzy too. B was playing peekaboo with Jarett.

He also gave me a surprise me when he was playing with the kitchen set by stirring a pot on the stove. I guess all that bugging me to carry him while I was cooking did set an impression. Prior to this, I was a little skeptical in letting him play a kitchen set because I thought it's for girls, no? And he never battered an eyelid at them when we were at indoor playgrounds. But seeing him having fun, being serious about his kitchen made me think twice. I should not be prejudiced and indirectly influencing him in thinking this way. Besides, if you look at all the toys set, they don't just put pictures of little girls playing, they also have boys in it. Smart marketing! His daddy, of course, saw that he enjoyed it, made it our mission to buy a set for him. And ELC had 40% off storewide with additional 10% for Citibank, which made the beautiful set cost $149 instead of usual $269. But, we didn't get it. 'Coz we saw another set at Toys R Us that was going for $80. Ya, call me a cheapskate. :D

**

We made another trip to Sentosa after the last trip. This time it was pretty well executed I think. We decided to "take a risk" and go in the morning instead, right after we all wake and he had his milk. I packed everything the night before so there's no need for any scurrying around before leaving. And since B is pretty much settled into his one nap a day routine, as long as we are done by 10, he can nap on his way back. 

Too much love.

Mornings are best coz the sun isn't too strong, and best part, the beach is not crowded.

His new trick - "if you're happy and you know it say hurray!"

We got there around 8am, played around and had light breakfast on the beach, cleaned up at 930am, proper breakfast at Mac around 10, got to car around 1015am and B KO-ed all the way home and continued until it was nearly lunch time. 

There had been so much more I wanted to blog about, but they seem relatively insignificant now. I guess that's what happens when you sit on them for too long.

DH is traveling and as usual, I miss him like crazy. He had the cheek to tell me my status has dropped - B is his favourite person now. 

For some reason... this status changed brought a smile to my face.

Car Seat Struggles

I am beginning to detest driving out alone with B. It used to be pretty straightforward - he goes to the car seat every time we get into the car with minimal struggle because he knows that's where he belongs. Even if he did struggle, I can easily trick him into sitting in with toys or books. But now, he wants to exercise his "independence".

There is so far 2 occasions where he had a major meltdown from refusing to get into the car seat. Both times, after some coaxing, I had to resort to forcefully putting him in while he's screaming murder and keeping stiff the entire time. What am I to do? There is no choice but to let him cry and scream. I surprise myself by turning a deaf ear to his cries because there isn't anything I can do, he's not getting out of it anyway and more often than not, once the car starts moving, his cries tone down. He will grumble and cry and complain the entire trip, but then he gets distracted by the buses and traffic. When he remembers, he starts his ruckus again.

Any tips to share on how to get your little ones in their car seats?

On a separate note, I wrote yesterday about how B clings onto me whenever I'm in the kitchen. I now mainly cook one-dish meal so that there isn't as much work or time spent in front of the stove.

Making wantons for tonight's dinner, featuring baby sleeping in the background.

And So The Clinging Begins

Sometime back, a friend asked how I manage to cook dinner everyday with a toddler in toll. My reply was, "I don't know".

It's true. I guess B is somewhat independent and plays on his own most of the time. He is kept entertained by his collection of buses and books. A lot of responsibility is also on me to make sure I plan the time properly. For example, taking a frozen meat or fish down from the chiller to the refrigerator so they can slowly thaw overnight, and taking them out to thaw first thing in the morning. Washing and chopping the veg in advance and whenever possible. The most is being done during nap times of course.

BUT. Yes, the dreaded but. This has changed recently. B has taken an acute interest in the kitchen. Everytime he sees me near the stove or sink, he runs in and cling onto my leg, wanting to be carried and see what I'm doing. I tried distracting him with toys, with boxes, with containers, with unopened tea bag sachets, with the door, with iPad, with tv, with everything. But if he sensed I'm in the kitchen, he runs in. Literally run in! I tried to put him in his high chair next to me, but no, he only wants to be carried. Argh. This makes cooking and preparing really tough and by the end of the day, I'm beyond exhausted.

At first I thought it was just separation anxiety. But no, only when cooking is involved. DH says he will be the future restauranteur. Well, if he's as rich as Daniel Boulud, Gordon Ramsey and other chefs, why not eh? If you ask me, I think chefs are sexy. Oops.

Hoping this will change soon, otherwise, I really need to find more things to distract him.

Finding Time and Discipline to Get Things Done

I haven't been updating as much as I like. Bear with me for awhile as I try to settle into a new routine and meeting "datelines".

As you might have been aware, I've recently took on a freelance role as a content curator for the a lifestyle website and I'm really enjoying it. Truth be told, it is not so much about how much it pays me (not a lot by the way), but more of keeping my brain active and doing things outside of the day to day caregiving duties. As a result, my already limited free time/me-time is taken up by doing some researching and sourcing for good topics.

So in my free time, I have to decide how I want to put it to good use. Some of the things I do when B takes his nap:

Prepare lunch/dinner
Catch up on whatsapp chats/facebook/instagram
Blog
Watch a kdrama
Nap

Now, I have to add in "work". I love it. Not only do I love what I'm doing, I like the fact I'm keeping myself busy with meaningful activities.

Now if you would excuse me, I need to go back to my office.

A Day At The Beach

Last Sunday, we took B to the beach. We had wanted to try but never really gone on to it. The last time we went to Sentosa for our staycation, he couldn't walk yet and he was fairly disgusted with the sand.

One of the reason why we have been putting the beach outing on hold is because of his nap time. Nowadays, he sleeps from 945-10am to 1130-12 noon. We prefer to go in the morning when the sun is less brutal. But last week we decided to just do it.

By the time we got to Palawan beach, it was almost 130pm.  We found a spot, lay out the mat and got to playing. It took a while for B to get use to the sand texture and get into the waters. But once he was warmed up, he was having a ball feeling the sand falls through his fingers and splashing the water.

We took a break and ate the food I prepared, drank our ice cold beer from the ice box we brought and B had his strawberry milk, sandwich and tons of biscuits. I have to say it was alot of fun.

But the sun that day was out to kill. Sunscreen, sunscreen, sunscreen.  That is the one most important thing for the tod. I was so kiasu I reapplied them on him every 20 - 30min. Getting him to wear a hat is not easy but he eventually gave in. Coupled with his rash guard, he was pretty well protected.

Spending Time with Daddy

Last Saturday, I had to help out at my good friend's wedding. It was kind of a whole day thing, and needless to say, I worried about how B will be spending the entire day without mummy.

Leading up to the day, I planned his meals and taught DH what to do, when to do and how to do.

The day came and I left home at 630am before the both of them wakes. While at my friend's place, getting all anxious and excited for her, my mind constantly went back home and I missed B so much it was ridiculous.

Well it turned out my worries were uncalled for of course. Father and son had a great time and when I got home in the afternoon, B was happy to see me. When I left for the dinner rehearsal, B cried looking for me room to room and it broke my heart when DH told me. But once DH distracted him with his favourite balcony door (sighs... a story for another day), he was happy again.

The next day, DH said to me.

"Baby I know its tough on you. Just spending one day with him at home had me spent".

Thank you for acknowledging it. But I love doing it.

Managing Expectations vs Reality

Many years ago, 17 years ago to be exact, I had a goal in mind. That was to get myself registered for driving test the moment I hit 18 years old. For the next 5 years, I look forward to my 18th birthday because I simply had to accomplish that goal. When I finally turned 18, I wasted no time and found myself a private teacher and had passed all my basic, advance and final driving test on my first attempt.

About 3 years ago when we decided we were ready to start a family, I had only 1 goal, which was to get pregnant. Not knowing what to expect and not timing it correctly, I found myself in a situation where I don't know how to react because things weren't going according to plan. Then, I told myself, "this is reality".

When I left school and started working at 18 years, I had another milestone that I was looking forward to. That is the day I turn 30. Everywhere I went, I was always the baby of the company I'm with, either in school or at work. Perhaps I was reading too much into it, but I always felt people would take me more seriously if I was a bit older, so I wanted to be 30 badly. And of course, in light of that goal, I must have a huge celebration when I did turn 30. It must be a huge, elegant bash. I had imagined wearing a nice outfit on a yatch, sipping champagne and eating canapés, and maybe getting drunk at the end of the evening.

The reality I found out not too long after B was born, is that this probably won't be possible until he's way older. I might probably yearn for just a day off in the kitchen, maybe yearn for a good foot rub or a body massage, or simply just a 2-hour nap.

You don't need to be 30 for others to take you seriously I've since found out. Respecting others for who they are, respecting yourself more importantly, and proving to others your capabilities despite your age through the results you deliver are more effective.

That said, turning 30 is just another day.

I turned 30 yesterday.

Learning Through Adverse Situations

A fellow mummy blogger shared this on Facebook. How apt it is for me, especially what we are going through at home.

It ain't major really. Except I have been down with a terrible cough for more than 2 weeks now and despite seeing a doctor and finishing my meds, it is not getting any better. And of course, as B's main caregiver, I should have put more thoughts into taking care of myself and ensuring B doesn't catch it from me. For 1 week plus, I gave myself and B a pat on the shoulders. Wow, he must be strong, my coughing fits doesn't bother him nor give him the virus. Well, lo and behold, 2 weeks later, my dear son caught it and I'm killing myself.

It started off one night where he couldn't sleep and was just tossing and turning in bed. I felt his forehead and it was feverish. We thought he was properly teething his final molars as I could feel it as I rubbed the teething gel. Gave him a little para and the next day he was fine. Then the runny nose started. And that cough. The next day was Sunday and I couldn't wait any longer because he did not sleep well at night at all. Searched everywhere for a clinic that is opened on Sunday and also capable of treating young kids. Found one, went there early and was pleasantly surprised there were quite a few baby patients. The doctor was ok, nice and thorough, but he is not Dr Z. He also prescribed antibiotics which I decided not to give to B since his fever wasn't the main thing and my gut feeling stopped me from doing so. I usually listens to doctors, most doctors that is. But this round I decided against it. If B is still not well by tomorrow, I will bring him to Dr Z for a review. 

Everywhere I read, there are articles saying cough medicine is not recommended for young kids. OTC cough syrups do not work for children. So am I really to sit and wait for the virus to go off by itself. His mucous are not bothering him as much as it is killing me. I'm impatient, my heart is aching so bad seeing him sleep and eat poorly. What can I do?!

Sighs.

Honestly, this is the first time B has fallen ill, majorly. I know after this episode, we will both emerge strongly, and I will have learn something new.

Meanwhile, this space might be a little quiet while I mend my broken heart and TLC my son back to health.

16 Months On...

The lack of updates really is due to a combination of factors: nothing outta the ordinary to update, some days I just wanna sink into my couch and space out, and I landed myself a freelance job curating content for a local site. So am still trying to get a hang of it. So rather than writing for the sake of writing, here's some pictures to do the talking.

School Tour

Some of you might be aware that B is extremely shy in the presence of strangers - he will cling onto me tightly like a koala, and that means even when there are strangers at home.

I am worried for the day he needs to go to school and am trying to start him young to avoid any potential meltdown. I may be kiasu, but my intent is stemmed from trying to minimise any traumatic experience for him.

Whilst I have no intention to let him attend school until he's 3, I've been searching around for playgroups that I can attend with him, in hopes that he gets used to the school's "play and learn" concept. But then again, I doubt it will serve the purpose I had wanted it to. So I decided to check out schools instead, trying to understand how the preschool systems work and how we could potentially make his admission easier.

I toured a school recommended by an ex-colleague whom I trust a lot when it comes to making decisions regarding her kids. Turns out one of my ex-schoolmate sends her son there too. It was my first ever visit to a preschool and I did not know what to expect. So I turned to my mummies' group and asked the experienced ones what to look out for, questions to ask etc.

It was very interesting and B seemed genuinely curious and might even at one point seemed eager to join the kids. As we were walking around, I had a feeling B would do fine and I would be the one in a wreck. Having spoke to the administrator and had my questions answered, I think I am more confident now, as to how I will prep him. After all, he would be almost 3 by then.

I guess I still have some time to go seek recommendations and check schools out. Should be fun, except, the feeling is surreal. Looking for schools for my baby... I can't bear to think of it too much.

Deworming the Child

About one month back, my 6-year-old nephew had a somewhat severe case of worms. It started with constipation, then itchy anus and alas, worms coming out of his anus. I was thankful not to have witnessed it but my mum described it to me.

If you were like me before, I had never, ever heard of worms infestation. I mean, parasites yes, but I didn't know they actually crawled out of you. Some of you might be familiar with the term gam zek, I thought it meant the child was malnutrition, not absorbing the nutrients from food well. But well, worms infestation is the real deal.

I did a bit of reading and it seems some doctors recommend deworming your child every 6 months. While the medicine kills the adult worms in the body if indeed present, the eggs are not killed, hence the 6 months treatment. You can read more about deworming here.

B had his 15th month check up with Dr Z last Saturday, and I took the opportunity to ask if it was necessary to have him dewormed. For Dr Z's practice, he normally does not actively treat for worms unless there are signs of infection. But having heard B in contact with my nephew, he went ahead and treated him as a precautionary measure. The treatment was simple - only 1 dose of 5ml required, the remaining 5ml can be kept for 6 months later. And with that, DH and I felt somewhat relieved. I think its the psychological factor.

That said, I look forward to each pd visit (touchwood! Of course just for his routine checks and vaccine and not when he's ill, which we are so thankful his first year went by without falling ill. Please don't jinx this.) Still extremely shy, he "fought" with Dr when it was jab time, quite a funny scene, and again, the number of people needed to distract him was embarrassing. Even the doctor had to join in singing "The Wheels on the Bus".

I did learn something interesting from Dr Z. He was asking about B's vocabulary and if we had started reading to him. I boastfully yet embarrassedly replied I did that long ago, and got a approval nod and "good" from him. When we told him B even wanted to have a say in the choice of books we read, he said, "ok, but don't give him too much choices." It's good to let him practice making decision via selection of books, but do not give him too many freedom in doing so. Maximum 2 books. As in with clothes selection, do not make the mistake of letting them choose what to wear. Thankfully he doesnt have a say in what he's wearing, but the selection of books, we basically just let him go to the shelf and pick whatever he wants. An interesting perspective presented by Dr Z... we'll try to see if there's any difference when we adopt his method.

Things That Got Me Emotional This Morning

Since B started walking, things have changed. But there's one change that got me rather emotional - brushing his teeth.

When he was about 3 months old, I started using a finger brush to clean his gums, really hoping to start his oral hygiene young. Then when he had 4 teeth, I changed to a bristle brush with a fluoride free toothpaste. Every day, we brush his teeth while he's having his shower, twice a day. But this has since changed. Now, we let him stand on the ikea stool in front of the sink, brush his teeth and clean his face when he wakes in the morning. This simple act, brings about an overwhelming - it signifies my baby has grown.

Him going to nap on his own made me happier. B and I had come a long way with his sleeping/napping schedule. I guess hanging on was worth it.

Don't Rob My Son Of His Babyhood

Today's post is written entirely with my heart, not too much of my brain, i.e. written under extremely emotional circumstance.

Everything about my son is perfect. I bet every mothers feel the same about their child. Can you blame them? They spent almost 40 weeks carrying the little being in them, worrying about whether their uterus is providing them a conducive growth environment, worrying about whether they are growing well enough, fast enough, good enough.

Define enough.

Sure they are the guidelines set by the international healthcare industry. At 16 gestational weeks, the baby is supposed to be this length and weight. At 32 gestational weeks, baby is supposed to be growing and moving at this rate. At 4 weeks old, newborn baby should be 1kg heavier than their birth weight. At 6 months, babies should expect to see teeth sprouting out. At 9 months, baby should be able to... ... ... ...

You get the gist. Even before they are born, they are expected to do/perform something. No pressure.

I fall into the trap too. I read about what are some of the milestones baby are/can/maybe able to do at a certain age. And each time I read about the stage B is in, I give myself an internal pat. B is doing exactly what babies his age are doing, in fact, even earlier, more advanced etc.

But then it comes to walking.

He started cruising when he was about 10 months old. But because he's so fast, and I mean really fast at crawling, I don't think he has any incentive to walk. Either that, or his little body is just not ready. Sure, all of his peers have started walking long ago. But truth be told, I am not worried or bothered because having spend 24/7 with him, I know where he's at. Even the pd is not worried having seen him in action.

That said, over the last 3 weeks, he's been walking. Taking independent steps. But I realised the problem with him is - he wants speed. Instead of taking slow, steady steps, he rushes through and as though he's running. Typically example of 还没学走要学跑。(translation: learning to run before mastering walk). But he stands, squats and walks pretty well. I guess he just prefers to crawl? I'm not sure.

Today, after having one glorious hour of the entire of Petite Park to ourselves, this PRC mother and his Singaporean husband came in with their 18 months old daughter. How did I know she's 18months? Her mother made sure I knew. It all started cordially, when they were very amazed at how fast B was crawling. Then the hubby asked, "how old is he?"

"15 months".

Silence.

Wife: 多大了？(How old is he?)
Husband: 15 月 (15 months)
Wife: 15月还不会走路？那他很迟走。我看要等18月才能走了 (Still can't walk at 15 months? Wow, he's a slow walker. I think he will only walk at 18 months).

At this point, the hubby was a little embarrassed and I was taken aback. B decided to at that point stand up and walked over to me.

Sure, what she said was true. My boy is a late walker.

But, so?

Not wanting to be in their presence anymore, I carried B and left the place. But as I was driving home, I got really mad. Why is a stranger making such a comment? My son is so innocent, and the over protective mother in me got really really upset that he had to be the recipient of such comment.

Then I realised, especially lately with the Primary 1 registration anxiety, society is as such. People tend to compare whether consciously or not. I bet I do that unknowingly too.

But all I ask for, especially from a fellow mother, is please refrain from insensitive remarks and don't rob my son of his rights as a baby.

Singapore Mom Bloggers

Over the years, I have blogged on various platforms to document the different stages of my life. The two most important stages were when I was preparing for our wedding in October 2006 and then of course, preparing for the arrival of B.

It is through blogging that I learned much from others, and also got to know friends like Karen whom we have both gone through similar life stages together.

Today, I am pleased to share I am a member of the Singapore Mom Bloggers - where a group of mummies come together and share our parenting experiences.

I am inspired by how some FTWMs can juggle work-life balance, and how SAHMs can make the best use of their time at home with their children, being a mother to their children and a loving wife to their husband. I too, hope to be able to bring some personal experience to share with all.

Singapore, My Home

Granted, the title is a little cheesy. But I am a true blue Singaporean and proud to be one. Well, maybe proud of my country but at many times turned off by my so-called fellow Singaporeans.

Anyway, today's post is inspired by our national anthem, Majulah Singapura.

You see, lately, Master B has decided to have a say in his lullabies. 10 seconds into a song he chose he decided he wants another. So much so I have ran out of kiddy songs and somehow I decided our national anthem might just do the work. It is soooo s..l..o...w. Turned out it worked. So today I decided to do it again, and it worked again. Then I started singing all the "old" national songs we used to sing and practice in school. "Count on me, Singapore", "Singapore Town", "One People, One Nation, One Singapore", "We Are Singapore".

"We Are Singapore" is one of my favourites, amongst many others. And as I was singing this to B, tears welled. Surprise surprise. We are talking about the Queen of Crying here. But it dawned on me, no doubt not the first time, how far indeed, Singapore has came along.

There was a time, where people said that Singapore, won't make it, but we did.
There was a time, where troubles seemed too much for us to take it, but we did.
We built a nation, strong and free
Reaching out together, for peace and harmony.

This is my country
This is my flag
This is my future
This is my life
This is my family, these are my friends
We are Singapore, Singaporeans

Argh, even as I typed this, I get the goosebumps.

Well, I may not be the pioneer generation. Nor have I gone through those said difficult times. But I have heard from my parents and grandparents first-hand encounters, I have read about it and more importantly, I am proud of where we are today. As a young, small and vulnerable nation, we have accomplished much. Not wanting to compare or diss other countries, but there are other nations out there with far more natural resources, stronger, deeper history than us, who are no where near us. That, we have to be thankful of what we have today.

Sure, there are much to gripe about. But gripes, complaints, grievances exist every where. Every country and government has their own issues, pros and cons. That, to my fellow Singaporeans, I say:

Stand up, for Singapore
Do the best you can
Reach out for your fellow men
You've got to make a stand
Recognise you can play your part
Let it come right from your heart
Be prepared to give a little more
Stand up, stand up for Singapore.

I once wrote a letter to the PM (yes I did!) after the Punggol East by-election. And you know what? It was forwarded to the Minister of Culture, Community and Youth and we exchanged a few emails. His ending words to me? "Do your part for Singapore, be louder than the opposition supporters in the social media platform. Do whatever you can to speak up for the people who share the same views as you".

I try. :)

Speech

B's grasp of communicating and his vocabulary amaze me all the time. I find myself being pleasantly surprised often. Things that I did not think would register, did. Those books were right I guess - speak to them like you would to an adult, no baby talk and keep communicating with them from day 1.

Not because I am following instructions from those parenting books,  but because since confinement days, I am usually home alone with him and to keep my sanity, I talk to him a lot.  "Baby, mummy's gonna change your diaper/feed you/give you a bath etc". When playing with him, I generously threw in the "I love yous" and "mummy's sweetie pie". You know,  a bit like Tom Hanks and his basketball friend Wilson in Castaway.

Besides imitating the sounds animals make, he recognises a lot of the flash cards. . Even though I stopped flashing for a while.  We've been reading a lot of Peppa Pig lately - he seemed to have moved on from Goodnight Moon. With Peppa Pig, his favorite pages are those that he can show off his "grrr", "oink" and "roar".

I'm On A Roll

Well... I decided since I'm free now (DH went for his gathering with army friends and B is knocked out), might as well blog what I had originally planned for tomorrow.

Check out the mess.

But what is this bit of mess if it brings me 20-30 minutes of peace and quiet? B is pretty self sufficient in that sense... he doesn't bug me to play with me, unless he sees me loitering about. Most of the time I feel so guilty that he is playing alone I go and disturb him and offer to play with him. Sometimes I just enjoy the peace and go about doing my chore or cook. But we get so tired of clearing up his books and flashcards we decided to get a proper book shelf. This was shared by a few mummies and I absolutely adore it. B loves it too! Makes it easier for him to pick and book and throw on the floor.

DH took the day off to accompany me to Dr Wong's today for my routine pap smear. I had initially wanted to bring B alone but the appointment clashes with his nap and even if he wasn't asleep, I know there is no way he would let go of me and therefore I can't get my checks done.

It was soooo good to see Dr W and be back in her clinic. The clinic assistants were happy to see B, while B on the other hand, was obsessed with the toys there. It was even more surreal for DH and I to ne sitting there, looking at the card I made for Dr W and looking at all the first time parents expecting their love.

One of the first question Dr W asked after B was delivered was "is other of you mixed blood? He looks a bit mixed". Today, Dr W asked again, she was pretty sure there must be some mixed ancestry way back up the family line. It was quite funny.

Well, who knows when is the next I will see her right? Since DH and I are taking the not-trying-not-preventing approach.

Let's see.

Let's Talk Crap

Excuse the language, but I meant it literally.

My poor boy suffered from constipation 2 days back. And by constipation, it's not the usual have-not-pooed-for-few-days kinda constipation. It was the rock-hard-poo-stuck-at-anus kinda constipation.

Well, sorry for the visual imagery you might have now, but I reckon since most of my readers are mothers, you probably also hold a major in poology.

It started when he was doing his usual straining, as he always does, regardless the texture of his poop. And after awhile after he stopped, we thought, "ok, time to change him". Turned out, nothing on his diaper. We scratched our head but let it be. Almost an hour later, the straining started again, and we checked, and yet nothing. This time, B started whining a little. The whines became louder and it evolved into cries. I checked his anus and saw the poop already there but it was too hard for him to force out. Poor baby. We didn't know what to do, he was crying, we were helpless and the poor boy had to suffer. So I tried to lift both his legs to his chest and he cried even harder. I undress him and took him to the shower and spray water up thinking it might perhaps help. No idea what I was thinking. In fact, I wasn't thinking.

We decided to stop and let him rest when I saw "it" gone back up. He stopped crying. Took and chance and gave him dinner, surprisingly he still had an appetite and finished dinner. I thought maybe some form of exercise or movements might do his bowel movement good, so we let him play/chase bubbles. Then it happened again - this time he started crying at the first strain because he knew what was coming. No choice we decided to help him dig it out. Now is the time to skip to the next paragraph if you do not want visuals. Not wanting to injure the area around his anus, we took cotton buds and tried to dig the poo out. Indeed, the poo was rock hard, it was difficult to even dig the middle portion out. All this while I was carrying him, knees to chest and DH was trying to help. It did work though, within seconds IT came out. Poor baby - the look of relieve on his face. This is something I do not want him to go through again.

Prevention is always better than cure, and I have been conscious to make sure he gets his fruits servings every day. Usually apples, blueberries, papayas and kiwis. As for his water intake, boy, does he love water. I almost need to refill his magmag 2-3 times everyday. Our group shared before fruits that causes constipation and those that relieve it. The 4 Ps are good to relieve constipation - prunes, plums, peaches, pears (I'm surprised papaya is not one of them). A simple way to help relieve constipation is to get the BRAT out.

B = banana
R = rice
A = applesauce
T = toast

I think probably what contributed to B's constipation was too much bread and rice and apples! He has toast for breakfast almost everyday because he has no interest in other food. He has rice most of the time, and his favourite fruit is apple! I had introduced prune juice (diluted with some water) and gave him dragon fruit and papaya this week instead of apples. He was fine yesterday, but today no bowel movement. Hope it will be smooth sailing tomorrow.

Mourning

Being a mother changes my perspective on many things. For examples, I am more tolerant towards a crying toddler in public instead of finding them a nuisance. I am empathetic when I hear news of miscarriage.. I get very emotional when news of toddlers injuries or even death spreads around.

In recent light of both MH 370 and MH 17, my heart wrenched every time I read or hear the news report.  It could have happened to our beloved national carrier,  carrying people we know.. "so and so ' s friend was on that plane. ..", our nation could be mourning instead of our neighbours.

Life is so unexpected. Always treasure our loved ones.

The Little Actions

I think I have a cheeky monster. A cheeky monster who knows who he can take advantage of.

Yesterday while trying to get him to nap, he kept asking for water. After the 3rd request, I got tired and lazy and refused to budge. He asked again  and pushed me off the chair to go get it. The beginning of my slavery. May seems funny at that time but we think it probably is time to start disciplining.

Then for his second nap, he was clearly fighting the z monster and was already dozing off. But he decided to jump up and take his pacifier off and give me his megawatts grin which will melt you instantly. After he could no longer fight and realise he wasn't getting out of a nap, he fell asleep really quick.

This morning, as I was pouring him a cup of fresh milk for breakfast, he went "moooo". Then I realised it was the cow on the magnolia packaging. Too funny.

And again as we were prepping for nap, I asked if he can call me mummy. He did, but threw in an extra "daddee". His father was so happy to learn that.

As the days go, he's more aware of what's happening and constantly surprises us with his little actions. It's when I find myself laughing and grinning all the time that I realise this boy really is my everything. I am nothing without him and my hubby.

Quiet Birthdays

I wonder if its true that as we get older, birthday is yet another day.

Even before B came along, DH and I had stopped our partying ways long ago. We did drink very often, but not to the extent of waking up with a massive hangover. As far as I remember, except for his 40th, the last few birthdays were pretty low key - dinner at a nice restaurant followed by drinks at a fancy bar. Just the 2 of us.

Last weekend, we celebrated his 42nd birthday, which is today. Asked him what he want to do and he said, "Just quality family time with both of you". I had wanted to do a last minute staycation at Ritz and was this near to booking it. But after sleeping on it, I decided against it, for we just came back from Shang, this was too last minute, I didn't want to take advantage of our good times at Shang and do it again without proper planning and risk B possibly ruining what could be one of the most expensive night stay in Singapore for us. Hahaha. But it is crazy expensive - one night stay in Ritz could bring us two nights at some other hotels, even Conrad!

Anyway, we were glad I didn't make a rash decision and decided to cook for him instead. So after B went to bed, we enjoyed dinner over a bottle of really nice Chardonnay. Best thing? Everything cost less than $100.