The blogger before me, Prayerfull Mum shares her journey as a WAHM and a newbie at starting her own business. Danessa shares her struggles as a WAHM and juggles parenting, and aims to reboots her life by doing 15 things differently this year.
So, here are the 15 things that I will do differently in 2015.
1. Be more patient
I used to think I am patient, but turns out patience do run out. After a few bouts of food strike by B, I've come to realise he is a stubborn guy, more so than I am, and the best way to handle such a situation, although it can be hair-pulling frustrating, is to be more patient. I should stop hurrying him to put on his shoes faster, go take a shower, come here, go there faster. He is, after all, still a toddler. Besides, I'm always the one who wished for time to stop going by so fast, so what's the hurry? So, patience is a virtue they say. I shall attempt practise more patience in my life.
2. Take care of myself more, less sloppy
Sometimes I wonder, since when have I started being so lazy in dolling up? I used to go to work every morning with full make-up - foundation, eyeliner, mascara, blusher. These were my necessities. Nowadays, I'm bare-faced most of the time (not that it's bad, but I have flaws that need covering), and when I do put on make-up for the weekend, it's just sunblock, loose powder and blusher. This year, I want to put more efforts on how I look, not just the make up on face, but how I dress, even on a weekday. I think the better you dress, the better you feel about yourself. So, out goes the sloppy clothes and time for shopping! Oops, I forgot I'm pregnant. Ok, maybe not shopping as of yet.
3. Do not worry about being judged by other mums - be confident and proud of my decisions
I think one of the things that bugged me most when I was a new mum was how other mums would judge me. I don't know why. "Has she stopped breastfeeding?" "Why is her child on pacifier?" "Why are they co-sleeping?", "why is she still carrying her child?". There are so many questions, I think mainly because if I had a choice, these are the things that I would not allow my child to do. But sadly, reality doesn't always agree with your wishes. So moving on, I shall not be bothered by what others think about our decisions and our parenting choices because one will not truly understand the reasons behind the things we do and sometimes, explaining to them is too tiring.
4. Blog more
When we first decided I should quit my job and be a SAHM to B, I knew I needed to do something to keep myself up-to-date with what's happening and stop my brain from rusting away. So what better way than to blog and stay active in social media. Unfortunately, sometimes other chores prevent me from doing so, and honestly, sometimes I'm just too tired to do it. I really have to give it up to other mums who are treating this whole blogging business so seriously and I do need to motivate myself to do the same.
5. Exercise more - more yoga
I never thought I would be someone who is so into yoga but I really, really enjoyed it. After giving birth to B, the only form of exercise I could get was yoga and that is something you can practise at home too.
6. Be more creative in the kitchen
I enjoy cooking, a lot. Before B, I usually cook over the weekends, taking my time to prepare the ingredients and sipping a glass of wine while at it. Now with B, it becomes a responsibility to make sure he eats well. So I hope to be more creative in the kitchen, learn more recipes and perhaps bake more.
7. Be mindful of how I treat DH
Well, DH disagrees with me, but I feel that I have somehow neglected him. Before B, we spent so
many days and months and years, enjoying each other's company but this has changed. We obviously still spend quality time together, and our conversations usually revolves around B or his work. I want to focus on him more, especially when Clara comes along, I think I will neglect him even more.
8. Make an effort to keep in touch with people I sincerely want to keep the friendship
Good friends are hard to come by. Those that have gone through phases of life with me are significant. Sometimes we allow time to distant ourselves or petty incidences draw us apart.
9. Read more
One of my favourite past time since a child was reading. But since smartphones and social media entered my life, I've put reading aside and I really want to pick it up again. It's not the same reading an e-book, I love to flip the pages as I go along. Being part of a book club was a fun thing, although I don't think I can commit to being in one now. But, heading to the book store this weekend would be a good start.
10. Be more flexible and cut myself some slack
I think I don't give myself enough credit for the things I've been doing as a mother and have been fairly harsh to myself. With the arrival of Clara, I think things will get a little haywire, so learning to cut myself some slack will do us all good.
11. Pick up a hobby if time permits
I don't know what this might be, in the past, I listed my hobbies as cooking, reading, swimming, drinking. Yes, drinking, alcohol! It would be nice to pick up a new hobby and something to keep me preoccupied besides the kids.
12. Be less of a worry wart
I worry when B is eating too little, too much, sleeping too little, sleeping too much. I worry when I think I put on weight. I worry when I think my cooking is to salty/bland/spicy/sweet. I worry when I have not taken a shower. I worry when I wake up late. Basically, I worry too much over unnecessary stuff.
13. Be happy & thankful
There is SO MUCH I have to be happy and thankful for. I need to constantly remind myself that, and whatever difficulties or challenges I face at any particular time, those too will pass. I am blessed with a doting and loving husband, a beyond incredible 21-month-old boy and another baby girl on the way. What more can I ask for?
14. Be more forgiving
Regardless to others or self, only when you can forgive, you move on. Forgive friends who are single, or married with no kids for telling you what a bad thing you are doing by allowing your child to cosleep/pacifier/watch iPad. Forgive family members who tell me they had done this before 20-30 years back and it's not as complicated as I put it to be.
When I look at B, my heart burst with love. I want to continue this love for him, C, and DH. I want to also love myself more, my family more.
There you have it, 15 things I'll do differently. It wasn't as hard as I thought, and I bet I could probably come up with a few more.
Next up on this blog train is...
Working mums often struggle with work life balance especially with little kids. Susan, a mum blogger of A Juggling Mom shares how she juggles between work and caring for her family while sharing inspiring stories on parenting, marriage and wonderful travel experiences with her family!