Friday, September 28, 2012

Reaching for the Medicine Cabinet.. Not

Many things in life we take for granted. The simple act of popping a pill from your medicine cabinet is one such thing. Every time I feel a cold coming, I pop a Panadol cold or the flu medicine from my last visit to the doctor. And after 3 pills, you usually feel better.

Now with baby, many medicine are out of bounds. I caught a virus that was going around in the office. Blame it on the co-worker behind me - sniffing and coughing for the last couple of weeks.   It started off as a sore throat, and eventually I couldn't stop sneezing. Worried that the bug might affect baby, I went to the doctor hopefully for some quick relief.

But, doctor said, this is the time where you want to limit medicine intake if possible. So she only  gave me a gargle for my sore throat, and some tablets for my runny nose, with instructions to only take half a pill (of the already tiny pill) when I really can't take the congestion anymore.

Now you tell me, with instructions like that, would I want to risk taking the medicine? Obviously I tried as hard as possible to avoid, and took 1.5 days off work just to sleep the bug off.

My throat is better, thanks to saltwater gargle and Manuka honey. My nose however, feels like its reacting to an allergy. But we'll be fine.

The good thing coming out of this? DH agreed to sleep without the aircon. It was so cozy.

Ahhh.. the simple things in life.


Friday, September 21, 2012

Saying is Believing

Seeing is believing is no longer enough.

I've seen my little one on the ultrasound. It's the most incredulous feeling, but, it ain't enough.

I've been spending time bonding with baby, to recommendations of friends and the book What To Expect When You're Expecting. With my hand over my belly, I tell baby what a great job she's doing, that I'm so proud of her and that we love her very much. In the beginning, it sounds so stupid. But as I keep talking to baby, it becomes more real that we have created a life and its residing in me. It's overwhelming.

Referring myself to "mummy" makes me giggle. Me? Mummy?

Yes, I think it sounds about right now.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

PITA... Pain In The Ass


Considered yourself warned. This is not a post about how I'm gushing about my little one.

Pregnancy can literally be a pain in the ass.

What used to be a smooth process is now hard and painful. Puns intended.

Sighs... 

Friday, September 14, 2012

Say Hello to the Flickering Light

So the day finally came. The big day of our first prenatal appointment and first meeting with our baby. I've been so tensed up over this day and couldn't wait for it to come sooner. The 'what-ifs' keep popping into my mind - what if doctor sensed something is wrong? What is doctor can't detect the heartbeat? What if there isn't a baby afterall?

After 3 weeks of waiting, I can finally breathe.

We waited for almost 45 minutes till our turn to see the doctor. As usual, Dr W is so friendly and smiley that she puts me at ease instantly. When she said, "ok let's go and have a look!", I think my heart skipped a beat. And one thing happened after another, I was going through motion. "Leave your bag here, remove your shoes, pull your pants down a little, lie here..". I couldn't breathe, I couldn't move, all I did was stare at the screen in front of me. Please, please, please let there be a heartbeat.

I figured the first thing the gynaes usually do is to look for the heartbeat, as that was the first thing she said, "there's the heartbeat". I couldn't see or hear anything after that. All I know was this little flickering light was flickering at a fast, constant speed and nothing else mattered at that point. I cried tears of relief. DH looked at me and smiled. Dr W continued to move around, looking for the best position to take the crown to rump measurement, checking the water bag and its surrounding. It was over before I know it, the nurse whisked me up. I pouted internally, I still want to see my flickering light.

But, it's an image I will never ever forget.

Monday, September 10, 2012

Where is the Glow?

So where exactly is this pregnancy glow or radiance?

Across the last 3 weeks, I've had many people (mostly colleagues) coming to me asking if I'm fine and that I looked tired. Granted, I do feel tired by the end of the day, but usually during the day, I feel alright. Those comments have prompted me to line my eyes thicker and touch up my red lippy often.

The first big prenatal appointment is this Thursday, we will be 7 weeks 4 days I think. As much as I've been looking forward to this day since I tested positive, I'm worried and nervous. I try to shun away from negative thoughts and concentrate on what an amazing job the little one is doing in the uterus.

Morning sickness (ms) is mostly manageable - it doesn't really happen until after lunch. The hours between 1230 to 530pm are worst, but manageable. I only feel nauseated, and no actual vomiting. Appetite is poor, and fortunately, I have no food cravings. I've had more cravings pre-pregnancy.

Looking forward to meeting the little one on Thursday.


Tuesday, September 4, 2012

When Life Throws You Lemon...

When DH and I got married in 2006, we made it clear that we want no kids. Just the two of us.

One day, AF came late and we panicked. But no, we weren't pregnant. We thought we should be relieved, but it turned out we were extremely disappointed. I felt like I lost something that I didn't even had in the first place. That was the first time we thought, "hey, maybe we do want kids".

Fast forward a few years later, I've completed my 3-year course, I've changed jobs and settled into a new one. Last August, we decided to start trying.

You would have thought trying means to use no contraception/protection. No, there's a small window when you are fertile. Even if you meet that window, it doesn't guarantee a pregnancy.

Given, we weren't doing it as often as we needed to. I wasn't sure when my ovulation will take place. It was a give-and-take kinda thing. I got frustrated after 6 months, and decided not to try anymore. We took a 3-month break.

Suddenly, a dear friend got pregnant, someone at work recommended a TCM practitioner to me, I changed my mindset and outlook of life and what I want to achieve, said friend's pregnancy failed, another friend got pregnant, I got angry.

All these happened in less than 2 months.

But I've always believe things happen for a reason, as cliche as it may sound. With a clear and stable mind, I'm probably mentally ready.

That said, I'm pleased to share that LadyInWaiting is no longer waiting to get pregnant. She's waiting to the day she meets the little one in her.



Whilst I was a little hesitant in blogging about this, 'm only 6 weeks now, the incessant negativity in me is driving me nuts. I need a place to rant and get over my fear and wait patiently for my first prenatal appointment with the doctor.

This is, afterall, my journey to the bump.