Traumatised

I made a mistake last night. A grave mistake.

I went on Baby Center and clicked "Watch Live Birth: Natural" and "Live Birth: Epidural".

Grave, horrendous mistake. What possessed me to do it?

Well, I thought it might be helpful to be a little prepared and know what to expect, thinking it will be good for DH. I was freaked out. It wasn't how the mother squirming and moaning in pain that scares me, it was seeing the baby's head crowning at the vagina that killed me. It is not a scene for the faint-hearted. It's like seeing an alien coming out of you, it is THAT SCARY.

I guess I now can imagine why episiotomy happens.

Good lord, why oh why did I click on not one, but two of those videos???

I'm scarred.